Check your shoes.

"It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it’s the pebble in your shoe."
-Muhammad Ali http://www.muhammadaliquotes.org/

This past weekend I felt out of control. I was uncomfortable with myself. I blamed my unease on everyone else. Their needs, their schedule, what they couldn't give to me, what they were giving to me. I didn't like any of it. I could find a complaint for anything and everything in my life. I was like a baby who needed to be swaddled. My arms were flailing, my face was scrunched up, that wrinkle that appears on my forehead was leaving a bold streak, and and my tummy hurt.

It took a painful conversation for me to stop my screaming, look at myself and realize that this pain was coming from myself. This discomfort was self inflicted. If only I had taken time to look in my shoe and remove the stupid pebble. Possibly I could have provided an empathetic response to those I care about. I would have communicated more clearly instead I was throwing jabs. Nope. I chose to keep the pebble in my pretty shoe and gave quick, petty answers as I was biting back pain. You have the picture? Add the scrunched face and painful tummy. Not pretty.

It's a daily process. Next time we talk? If I start to treat your contribution as irrelevant ask me to take my shoes off. I might need to do a little self check.